Parenting Styles: Which One Are You?

Parenting style seems like a never-ending evolution. One hundred years ago, children’s opinions are often left unheard. But in the recent years, parents have become more attentive to their children’s needs, thoughts and feelings.

Nowadays, parenting experts categorized parents into four types: authoritative, controlling, permissive, and uninvolved. Know the differences of these parenting styles and find out which one are you.

1. Authoritative
These parents have rules, and they often take the extra mile of helping their kids understand why these rules exist and should be followed. They respond to their children’s thoughts and have realistic expectations for them.
Authoritative parents invest so much time and energy on their kids to prevent behavior problems as they age. These parents also use positive discipline, like reward system and praising to reinforce good behavior.

2. Controlling
They often do not take the effort to understand the reason behind the child’s action and are usually unresponsive to their child’s desire to know and understand the motive of the rules. Controlling parents believe that children should always follow their directions, with no exception.

If you often say “Because I said so” or believe that it’s “my way of highway” when it comes to your rules, then you may be this type of parent. While this can be effective for some children, others can be at risk of self-esteem problems because they are so used to existing in an environment where their opinions are not valued.

3. Permissive
Parents who fall under this category do not have many rules for their kids and also have low expectations for self-control and maturity. These parents are responsive to their kids but have the tendency to take on the role of a friend, instead of a parent.

Do you think you are one of these parents? Permissive parents feel so much love for their children, but may not realize love without limitation can be detrimental.

4. Uninvolved
These are the “you are on your own” type of parents. They have very few rules for their children and meet only their most basic needs. Uninvolved parents expect their children to be independent and learn things on their own. They do not invest much time and effort into nurturing and providing guidance to their kids.

Sometimes, uninvolved parents do not have enough knowledge about taking care of children. There are also times that they are just overwhelmed with other responsibilities, like work, managing household and paying the bills. Because parents of these types are often sidetracked by other things, children may grow with low self-esteem, may perform poorly in school and even may not be as cheerful and happy as most children

There may be different types of parenting, but studies show that authoritative is the best parenting style. However, even if you have the tendency sometimes to be controlling or permissive, as long as you commit to be the best parent you can be, you can develop and maintain a positive relationship with your children.

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